A Last Visit

Two weeks ago, I had to give the most difficult "see you later" I ever had in my life. We knew after 3 years of fighting lung/brain cancer, my sister, Jennifer, had little time left with us, at least on this side of eternity. So, my family of four and middle sister headed to see her for what we thought would be a last visit. We were right. Jennifer passed away on November 4th, just three hours after my grandmother. I just want to share a little bit about that day so that I don't lose the precious memories. I wasn't sure how the day would go with just the heavy burden of the situation in itself. We arrived around 11 that morning and were able to stay until about 6:30 that night. It was truly one of the sweetest days for so many reasons. Both of my boys were perfectly content and entertained the whole day. Even more, it wasn't a sad day. I was able to talk to Jen, share things going on, all with her totally aware and responsive. She could speak very little but her facial expressions and nods spoke volumes. She got to watch a DVD of Luke's baby dedication at church. I would say that truly the most special moments were when my boys were up in the bed with her. L gave Jen lots of smiles and coos; J gave a clear pronunciation of her name, and she gave him a big smile. She knew how he has struggled to speak. At one point, I left to get my camera. When I got back, they told me that while they were waiting, J turned around, leaned up, and gave Jen a kiss on the forehead. It may sound small, but it was huge to me. Jen didn't look like herself at all. But, Jackson's sweet heart took over and broke down the barrier that could be there because of what our eyes were seeing. Our visit had to finally end, and Steph and I had our time with Jen, the three of us. We shed a lot of tears, but we also had the chance to share memories, hug, share some more memories, assure her that her boys would be taken of, tell her how special she was to us, and just tell her that we love her so much. I didn't want to leave her room that day, but obviously we did, and God placed a peace in our hearts. People started praying for us and continued throughout the weeks to come. God's peace is an amazing and wonderful gift. It is real, and it is only from Him. I wish I could write that with the confidence and passion that I feel about it. And, finally, I remind myself often that God knew and planned the day that Jennifer would leave this earth. It was no mistake, but He showed us His face. I believe He weeped along with us, because we are His children. Yet, He provided so much through Jennifer's life, and for that, we are thankful.